Cutbacks at Social Services...a light hearted tale

I used to work at Social Services, circa the early eighties.

Even in those days there were cutbacks. No computers then, oh no. Most of us had manual typewriters.

There were two secretaries with electric machines; the rest would cast envious eyes, and the lucky recipients of such machines had been known to suffer a sly jab with a knitting needle during the lunchtime visit to the staff rest room.

I was delighted to take possession of the next available electric typewriter; no matter that the M no longer worked, cutbacks were cutbacks, and it was the best I was ever going to get.

One day I was in disgrace; a not unusual situation for me. I remember my supervisor, standing in front of my desk, determinted to make a point.


"If you have time to photocopy certain of your body parts I am sure you have time to type these meeting minutes for me. IMMEDIATELY.".

She turned on her heel; leaving me to start work. I began typing frantically in a bid to find my way back into favour.

Job done, I scurried to her desk and deposited my work with a puppy dog smile.

Within thirty seconds she was back, her large shadow looming over my desk. I remember that the tip of her nose was white with anger.

"I think you'll find that my name benefits from having the M in front of it."

I looked in dismay at the typing, full of uneven spaces, and looked sorrowfully up at her face, which was still bristling with indignation.

"I'm sorry Miss Manus. Truly I am."

Oh what a night....

I'm just emerging...bleary eyed from the last Laughter-House comedy show. And what a night.

Right from the start it was a fire-cracker of a night...with an audience of 80 who were well up for a laugh..they raised the roof when our Danny Dawes hit the stage....

Danny, as usual was on cracking form. How does he do it? No material and funny as heck. Bouncing off the audience, who think he's the mutt's nuts. And they're right.

So what did Thursday night throw up?

Well, we did spy one solitary lady sneakily opening a Sainsbury's carrier bag and pouring herself a Ribena on the sly..., leading the venue manager to turn a wonderful shade of Italian Tomato...

And then of course there was the Unintelligible Heckler.

Now, there are some unspoken rules about comedy nights...

1.If you are going to heckle, say something intelligent.

2. Don't arrive at a comedy club completely pickled - it makes rule number one a tad difficult to comply with.

And if you haven't managed to comply with Rules 1 & 2 above, there's another. Never ever sit at the front.

Nuff said.

Like I said. What a night!

So...we've got a break now 'cos of the footie, and then we're back on Thursday 15 July with Jim Tavare headlining, so if you want to join the buzzy, intimate atmosphere that is our Laughter-House club come along and see why it's such fun.

Tickets available online http://www.wegottickets.com/event/82635

Tickets available from the Red Lion Hotel in the next three weeks or so....

In the meantime why not follow us on Twitter at Laughterhse or check out our website at www.laughter-house.co.uk

see you soon
Jan

Squirrel Wee Anyone?

So, another Laughter-House Comedy night has come and gone. It’s the little things which make me laugh. Like the way that one comedian looked at me when I said ”I’m doing five minutes, just before you.”

You’d think I’d suggested that he go outside and drink a pint of squirrel wee. He obviously didn’t approve. You could see it in his eyes “Oh no, the promotor’s having a go at performing.”

Thing is, I know my Laughter-House audience. Most of them have been with me right from the off. I’d likely be lynched if I didn’t go on stage. Even if only briefly. They like my naughty verse. They like me talking about my muff. They’re familiar with it. In a manner of speaking.

It was a cracking atmosphere. Our headliner, Brendon Dempsey, was awesome. ”Have a good one” I said to him, just before he took to the stage. “Oh, I always do” he said, smiling. “Not sure about the audience though.”

Don’t believe a word of it. They loved him and his casual Irish charm and clever humour. I think he was better the other night than when I've seen him on the TV. A definite re-book for Mr Dempsey.

So…what next? Well, promotion for the next show I suppose. Thursday 20th May, so I’ll need to go into Basingstoke Town Centre and prat about as a sodding elf again just to raise awareness.

The things you have to do! Still, beats working at Irrational Squid, being bullied for a living.

If you want to come along, we'd love to see you. You can buy your tickets online through our website www.laughter-house.co.uk